You're WORTHY.

Another 'brick' laid in the foundation my Union.

I began to notice where I wasn't claiming my worth, not putting forth my truth out of fear of someone's reaction or disapproval, and this discomfort was especially building up each time I was repressing myself in front of my twin, Josh. I was suppressing because I feared a massive blowout such as the one that began our initial separation in 2018, which, as it turns out, would guide me directly here, to Twin Flames Universe. That suppression, well, that's control, that's based in fear. I made a new choice, and released control. Here is what happened.

I claimed myself, surrendered the false idea of being perfect means not stirring up trouble, and pointed out some things that were bothering me about our behavior in our living situation. We had an argument about it, both said some not nice things, and slept back-to-back. The next day, we started out in polite greetings, but things were still not resolved. The fight was simply 'paused.' At night, we went out to a restaurant and the fight continued. It started off as the same argument, covering the same issues, both of us sticking to our 'arguments' and it just felt bad. I felt a stalemate, I felt the fear of failure, felt powerless, felt like running away, I felt the fear of being abandoned by God. I felt ALL the things I've ever felt. And yet, the new thing [---THIS IS THE IMPORTANT PART---] is that I remained there.

I stayed because I had no back doors, that was a choice I had made to go All-In with God and the Teachings of Union. I stayed because I knew I had made progress, and knew Jeff and Shaleia's school works. I stayed because I knew I had support and guidance here. I stayed because deep down, despite what it was looking like on the outside (it did get dramatic in our apartment after midnight) I loved God, knew God loves me, and love Josh and claim him as my man, my Twin, forever and always. I know and feel God's love, my own love, and Josh's love. It is just true.

At the climax of our fight, after realizing there was nowhere else to go, but to Love, I began just feeling love, choosing to feel love in my heart. I called on God inside of me, just chose, chose love, chose love, chose love. Then, Josh told me he had read the book, Twin Flames: Finding Your Ultimate Lover, the book he had originally thrown in his closet after I told him we were Twin Flames and shown him where Jeff and Shaleia had signed the book to us after I met them in New York. He had recently taken it off my shelf and read the whole thing when I wasn't there. He even recounted key parts to me.

Something had been cleared. There is something new here, something got healed in what appeared on the outside as messy and dark. It was all that darkness that was leaving, this layer of darkness that finally got deflated and dissolved like ashes (Avengers Endgame reference). I am don't know what is next, but I do know that my confidence is building, and it is building because I am choosing love in these dark places. I feel ever so grateful to be able to learn how to do this and to be given God's gift of ascension.

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