My Union Update
“Things can only move explosively fast if you do not attach yourself to them moving explosively fast. Things here can only grow in the way that God desires them to grow. Only through Him will growth occur and expansion happen naturally. Only through Him will Peace expand and flow, and it will go to places you could never have conceived of before He showed it to you. It happens like this every single time.” - Jeff and Shaleia of TwinFlamesUniverse.com
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I pushed ‘send,’ texting my promise instantly from my heart: “You are the most important thing to me, and I would do anything for you. I love you.” It was the jewel to crown the result of my mirror exercise. He didn’t reply, but this is typical and he didn’t need to.
I heard the sticky sound the weather stripping makes as the front door rubs against it, opening.
“Hi.” I said.
“Hello.”
He was wearing that navy blue T-shirt again. The soft one that shows the edges of his pectoral muscles. He was carrying two bags. One was a white hotel pillowcase he had stuffed with dirty laundry, tossed over his shoulder. He put them down. He offers his usual absence of small talk and welcome-home hugs. He just is home, and that’s that for him. No frills.
“I’m really tired,” he said. “I have to get one more bag from the car.” He ran his tattooed forearm across his tense brow and turned to head back down the stairs. It was an instant of breath, leaving his lips, that told me more than words.
“Wait.” I said no more words.
I came in front of him, my hand on his arm, I looked him in his blue eyes, and pulled him toward me. I kissed his mouth. A small, sweet pushing of my lips against his briefly. I pulled back to look at his eyes. They said, “yes.” Then we kissed again, deeper. And I just held him, felt his tight muscles and pressed my body into his. He loosened.
As if shaken from a dream, he pulled away. “Let me get my stuff.” And he headed down the stairs.
Moments later he returned and headed straight to take a shower. I was taking in an episode of Witcher. Watching Geralt and Yennifer kiss in front of the dragon. I heard the sound of the water turn off, and noticed the towel come off the rack. Then, the door.
Tiny water beads slowly traced the perfection of the small of his back, down the curvature that must be of a Fibonacci sequence. God’s perfection, this very specific perfection custom designed for me, and no one else. His mind was still on work, I could tell. I desired deeply to help him release it, to release everything with me and just be free with him, to let him be free with me.
He approached the dresser and began changing into night clothes.
I was there in an instant.
“No. Don’t put that on right now…please?”
Making love with my Twin Flame is just one sweet kiss with the entire being of our bodies kissing in all of the places they can. It is as if two oceans merge, or simply reveal themselves as never having been apart, waves undulating and pulsing, and there is just one thing: Love. I only experience feeling the kiss, and just wanting to love him and kiss him and receive him again and again, and love and kiss him some more. It isn’t about physical sensations, it’s about the love that generates during our choice to be together in this way, a love that is timeless, a returning to what already is, and consummating the Truth. My sweet, sweet love. my heart singing, for him, for God. I receive God’s glorious gift, fully and completely.
Every single part of the story was making love, from the moment I sent the text to when I came out of the shower myself and brushed my teeth. All of it was a beautiful string of jewels, a symphony with notes that start of gently, smoothly, and then develop to crescendo at a certain timely moment, and then the denouement.
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I could tell you to leave this story and read my post about healing. You can. I could tell you about the things I didn’t choose to put to words, a dark night of many days and shaky footing, when laid down in bed, and cried until I had no more tears to release, and loved myself, felt relief, and then allowed the next thing to come up, felt it, and healed it. I could tell you all about how my dear friends and coaches held space for me, how many TFAS classes I listened to all week long, determined to heal the block I had been facing. And that final moment, a key unlocking a secret lock – aha, and the love flows.
But you know I do this, this healing, this process. At least, you should already know. Because you do all of this, too.
I would rather you read the story the result of my healing, I would rather you know that as you release hell, beautiful Heaven awaits, and I want you to have that heaven too. It is already yours, you already have this, you, reading this, have this beautiful love from God right now.
Isn’t God glorious and generous? What a delight it is this Heaven is, and what wonderful grace to have the opportunity to heal and ascend each time, over and over again, returning to this state with Him!
